Friday, December 28, 2007

It Came From Beneath the Sea....

Honda Nighthawk
Originally uploaded by Jason Means

From time to time, bikes such as this 86 Honda Nighthawk (actually, Night-Heap would be way a more appropriate term at this point in time) come into the shop for repair, and then become a permanent resident with their own post office box. We try our best to limit this because both time and space are very precious resources at ScooterBob's, but occasionally, old pieces of rusty shit slip in under the radar and end up being "shop" bikes.

Typically, customers (well..."deadbeats" seems a more appropriate term, because "customers" actually spend money) bring in old clapped-out, hung down, brung down piles of shit like this Nighthawk and expect us to spray a little WD-40 on them, put air in the tires and and magically make there 23 year old turd that was stored UNDER the Titanic look showroom perfect. Naturally, this is fantasy.

In its current condition, a bike such as this is worth about $100 bucks. Kelly Blue Book lists a used one in "good" condition at around $400. This bike - in all of its rustiness and crustiness, needs at a minimum over a thousand dollars worth of work - just to run. Then, tack on over six months worth of storage charges since they can't seem to make up their minds. They all want their bikes fixed... but don't seem have any money, or more likely, aren't willing to spend any money... so, you do the math. Such is a day in the life at ScooterBob's indoor motorcycle junkyard and cryogenic storage facility. Maybe parts and labor will be cheaper in the far off future when the planet is run by damn dirty apes....

Yet, we still see junk like this on a daily basis. I really don't know if people are so dense that they can't grasp simple arithmetic, or if the value of the American dollar is stronger in their personal little fantasy world.

Don't get me wrong, working on old bikes like this within a budget can be fun.... to a degree, especially if you do the work yourself and don't mind spending months of your life surfing the web for parts. Since this heap isn't worth enough to fix up, and the parts are so shitty we couldn't sell them on Ebay, I've decided that I'm going to scrape the barnacles off of it, fix it up and give it to my old man. Dad has always had a soft spot for Nighthawks, and I'm sure he'll treat it way better that its previous owner.

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